We got SPORE last week; I loved the Cell Stage, and kept my little herbivore self away from those big carnivore dudes; and I had a lot of fun in the Critter Stage, running around and making friends. Other than getting squashed a couple times by humongous creatures who I didn't even see first, it was being a lot of fun. :)  I finally got my guy upright and pretty (and looking kind of like Gonzo from behind; hey, at least I fixed his waddle), and thought I was ready for the Tribal Stage -- when everything fell apart.

Suddenly the camera was everywhere but where I wanted it to be; I couldn't get my guys to do squat. MiLady helped me with a couple of basics, and I was just figuring things out when a rival tribe moved in. Huh? What? What the frell do I do now? I was pausing the game every fifteen seconds, desperately trying to figure out where I was, where my guys were, where the "enemy" was, where the rotten camera was, and WHAT THE $#@%?! DO I DO NOW?!? Moving the cursor to the Pause button made the bloody map move; there was complicated stuff I'm glad MiLady figured out, because without her I would have been up a creek. I finally get the instruments in place and get over to the other village, where I finally figure out how to do the social thing to the other leader -- and just as he walks over, my chieftain walks away. WALKS AWAY! From his first diplomatic meeting!

I quit. This game is obviously too complex for my simple mind and uncoordinated fingers. I've never really been good with anything I have to track in real time anyway; that's why I loved SimCity so much. And pausing never moved the map, either! I was never able to spend much time with the Sims, but my first experience with it led me to not care much. I can barely keep my own life straight, much less micromanage goddess knows how many virtual ones. And with my wussy pacifist worldview, I'm not real fond of the whole "must kill" thing. I was perfectly happy giving the predators a wide berth; now suddenly it's 'fight or die,' and I just don't think that way. I think I'll install Sim City 2000 on my laptop . . .

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